Animal farm intro paragraph.does this sound good. what do i need to revise? (10 POINTS)?

Power can be an amazing thing which leads to success. On the other hand, mishandling power can lead to corruption;depending on who possesses it. In George Orwell's, “Animal Farm,” the author expresses the abuse of power and the effect it has on people who obtain it. This is proved to an almost scary extent, especially because most of the characters are animals, not people. When nonconstructive human qualities take over whats really important and overcome ones ability to govern competently, power is corrupted.